Downwind, Downswing.

I'm more likely to write when I'm upset. Maybe it's just my way of wishing out loud for something better. I don't know why.

I like to think I'm quite a strong person, but sometimes I just feel so bloody damn vunerable. Right now, my Christmas wish is for someone to save me from my vunerability.

My life feel likes a downhill spiralling rollercoaster right now. I not sure what to do. The girl in the mirror is on vacation again.

Here's hoping I can smile through it all.

Headache, heartache: there’s no difference nowadays

So, this weekend I found out my best friend is now dating my crush. I’m happy for her, but I’m sad because now he’s taken. Also, I feel sort of lonely.

This year a few of my close friends started dating, some with people I don’t know, most with other friends of mine. I know you’re supposed to feel good single, but instead I’m alienated.

Maybe guys find me intimidating most of the time? Or maybe I get lonely to easily?

In addition to that, I’m doing poorly in school. I’m not failing, and I’m not doing horrible. I’m just not doing well. To my parents, it’s another painful argument.

All this is leaving me slightly depressed. However, you just can’t tell by looking at me. I can hide it well enough.

On a lighter note, I wrote an article for my school newspaper. It’s on Miu Miu’s sparkling socks from their Fall/Winter 09 collection, which I give instructions to make.  Hopefully, I can make a video tutorial sometime.

Keep fighting, loves.

Cut love out

As per usual, I made plans today that never fell through. I'm not that concerned. I've had a very low-key social life in the first place. I'm also the girl of sorts that somewhat prefers to stay home, eat junk food, and watch TV on the couch. However, watching shows were girls get a good man, fall in love, and etc despite shortcomings makes me, well, grouchy.

You could say I'm bitter, because I wish I could get a guy to fall in love with me. Maybe it's the conflict with the opposite gender from my childhood that makes me think this way, but how I wish.

Recently, I've developed a bit of a crush on someone. He's cute, tall, dark-ish. He even has loose curly locks, something I really dig. We get along quite well, and we laugh a lot. Similar perverted sense of humor. Yes, I'm perverse. We also have our differences, like him being a weird healthy eater, and me being a sweet tooth gal who just LOVES food (Planning to go to Lindt tomorrow to buy a whole lot of chocolate). You think that a girl like me, fierce, outgoing (despite enjoying staying home), and oh so bold, wouldn't hesitate to ask him on a date. Yet, I can't.

The problem is two other friends of mine seem to have a crush on him. One is my best friend whom I absolutely love to bits, and has had many love problems of her own. She also keeps me in the dark about a lot of her problems, so I'm happy she told me this. The other is a somewhat innocent and naive girl that is quite odd, and always seems to fall into one-sided loves. I'd feel selfish, and guilty of betrayal to ask him out.

Would it be worth it?

On a different note, I could die for these Christian Louboutin mesh shoes.





Pair it with this cardigan, hand knit sock, cute day dress, my favourite vintage leather bomber motorcycle jacket, and wooohoo. Extremely chic.

Good night, loves.

Grade 12, lame.

So, last year of highschool. It sucks. I had a total pain in the ass last week because of it. However, I was almost completely free this Thanksgiving weekend. I had a bit of reading and worksheet, but very low intelligence activities.

I'm super tempted to make some cookies right now, but I feel blog-ish instead. A bit cheesed for missing Glee last night, so I'm watching it now on Global. I'm disappointed though, because Emma Pillsbury makes no appearance whatsoever and I want to catch a glimpse of her super cute and colourful style.

However, on the topic of colour: I'll rant about Lime Crime's new lipstick and that I can't buy any.

http://www.limecrimemakeup.com/lips-c-72.html

Go look for yourself. IT'S FAB AND COLOURLICIOUS. The kicker, not yet trusted with credit. That's okay. One more year.

Doe Deere, every time I go to your blog I feel like the air around me has become sugar-flavoured and breathing it cause me to suffer ADD. Thanks for being awesome.

Btw, remind me not to drink pop at school anymore. It totally messed me up during the second half of school. My leg had a weird twitch and my brain was all fuzzed. Bad sign, bad sign.

I've been busy?

I'm officially loving the Whoniverse.

I think that's one reason I don't blog much. I tend to compulsively get sucked into one obsession or interest too quickly to talk about. I also happen to jump projects personal project all the time.



1. Since I last left you all, I've been trying to fill in some last minute things before school started. I'm proud to say, I've completed my first pair of hand-knit socks. Almost perfect. One seems more snug than the other. I'm guessing my tension flip-flopped in the year I made the socks. That, or one got stretched, worn and loved. I'm now starting my second (and possibly a coming third) pair. Wool sock are friggen warm. Most likely something be grateful for in the winter. The second pair was really supposed to be green cause greeeen is awesome, but then when I tried halfing the ball, I realized I didn't have a scale so I could make them equal.



I'll probably end up splurging some of my upcoming birthday money on sock yarn and find another project to use my single skein of green. Also, on a note to self, buy more knitting needles and some grey/white yarn. I'm thinking of investing in wood dpns since I'm liking the many pros of knitting socks, and I like the feel of wood. I justify needing the yarn to make super awesome Totoro mittens for a super awesome friend.

2. Sewing projects planned and started. I'm hoping to go into costume designing, so I'm trying to plan photoshoots, making/designing clothes, researching, inspiration, blah, blah, blah. My school is having its second fashion show and the theme for the designers is vintage. Apparently, I'm the first and hopefully last designer to know. Maybe my super seriousness, overall skill and knowledge will intimidate others. I know, it sound horrible, but the failure of others could be my sucess. Besides, I LOVE vintage and fashion is TOUGH. Dog eat dog, etc.

I'm also convincing my parents to let me take a corset making course. They're skeptical and concerned because it happens to be downtown and ends 9:30, when they want me to be in bed around 10-11. It was funny trying to explain what a corset was to them without having it sound weird and sexual. My mind is corrupted. Plus, on the subtext of vintage, I also went shopping for it with super awesome friends. I saw a super awesome summery dress which the two bought for me as a joint b-day present. Not a big fan of summer, but I hope it lasts long enough more me to wear it. I'll be needing a petticoat.

3. Other art project have also popped up. Drawings, paintings, half finished here and there. Shows happen as well. Television is such a distraction now that it's moving to the internet. Torchwood and Doctor Who are somewhat, you could say addictive. I hope season four happens fast. I miss Ianto and want Jack back.



4&5. Hair, awesome. Got it cut and style is rad and retro. I went to the beach. So much fun and sand. There was bees, cakes, bra, and wetness. Excuse the silly retro thing.

Lazy, lazy Trishna

I'm not much of a blogger, and it seems that with the damage my computer is taking, sharing one proves to be detrimental to my blogging. Not that I have much of a following to begin with.

As the title says, I've been lazy. Slacking off on my now two week left summer holiday. However, I haven't been doing completely nothing. I've made a stuff toy here and there. Actually, now that I think of it, that's about it.

I also got a haircut. =]It's cuter, shorter, and retro.

You know what, I promise on my talent to get back to you. With pictures!

Crap, it's almost spring

Did you know I dislike spring. Mainly early spring when the snow all begins to melt, and shit soup is everywhere. It does however provide me a good excuse to wear rain boots.

I'm sorry to say that there is no real business to this post other than the fact that I am SO PISSED AT MYSELF for various reasons.

1. Fact was misspelled as fat. This is probably part of my current issue of weight gain over the last few weeks. Especially this week as I am on my "cycle". I'm not obese to which it would become a big deal, but I am quite short, chubby, and my genetic future seems a very plump. The main problem is that I LOVE food. I love and enjoy eating, cooking, chocolate, etc. Also, it doesn't help that I'm a fast eater and lazy to the bone. I do hope to shed some before the weather gets warmer so I can wear my nice clothes.

2. Math is a bitch/my bitch. It's giving me such a hard time trying to dominate over it. I love math, but it won't let me enjoy it without a fight. WHY ARE YOU SUCH AN UNNECESSARY PAIN IN THE ASS, FUNCTIONS?

3. I want new spring clothes.

Anyways, it's late. I'm tired. I'll post some pictures of FOs and my new self-haircut over this or next week.

YAY TO BREAK!

Ooooh la la!

Yeah, it's not knitting. The pic is kinda blurry, I look kinda sleepy, and my eczema's coming back, though it's soooo lovely. Retro 50's hair is schmexay.



I've been looking at vintage styles and all that retro 20's-60's sort of stuff for inspiration and stumbled across a hairstyling community. SO DAMN AWESOME! I LOVE VINTAGE!

Btw, harhar, check out my tuxedo shirt.

You never really know a person

Honestly, if there was one thing I regret about my grandfather's death, you could say that it could be partly because I never really knew that much about him. I read a blog post by my uncle, correctly known as a family friend. It was a lovely story, and by reading it, I feel like I have to admit it.

http://themaindesk.blogspot.com/2009/01/ending.html

I wish there was more I could say, but having a cold makes my head all fuzzy. Also have to study for exams.

I blame the schools

Yes, school is the #1 excuse for lack of knitting and blogging.

Exams for my high school next week. Holy crap. Grade 11 sucks. I'm pulling crams since I have Chem and Bio, dubbed challenging subjects, and then English, aka weakest subject. Essays are so BS. Unfortunately, I'm buried under due assignments. One of which I'm finding it painful NOT to procrastinate on.

But then I'll be over for the first sem, and be relaxing during the second. I have History, Fashion, Math, and Art, and I love them all. =]

Also, I've been running around like crazy since I had to do a few things in preparation for my late grandfather's funeral. I was given the daunting task of singing in public. Not that I don't like it, it's that the way I'm told to do it is quite unpleasant.

Overall, I have no time to knit. Or for that matter live. Oh well. Here's hoping I pass.

Oh, life, take me round

Last Wednesday, my grandfather took a turn for the worse. This Monday, he passed on. God, I'm not the best religious person out there, but do what you can for him. He was a good person. I thank you for letting him go peacefully, and I hope you can take care of him for however long it maybe. Thanks.

That being said, I'm not entirely happy nor sad about his death. I'm glad he went peacefully and was comforted by family and good people before he left, but the sadness that occurs afterward is quite unpleasant. There's a more sober, serious air about and it's a bit too reserved for me. Also, I wished I could have known him a little better and I really for my grandmother.

Moving on to less important matters, my father and I are on edgy terms. He's still being a jerkbutt, and I'm still putting a stance. He kept bothering after he knew I was on willing speaking terms with him, so I shove a piece of ice down his shirt. He put one in my shorts when I turned around. You can't let have that, can you? I'm still pretty pissed.

I've just Youtube'd a bunch of spinning and dyeing tutorials today and yesterday. I am now very dead set on trying to dye and spin. Errrr. . . I used to be an anime nerd. What the hell is happening?

It's late but, things I want to do this year regarding knitting and the like:

1. GET A JOB! (How else can I fund my addiction?)
2. Learn more cables and lace
3. Make a sweater for littlest brother and myself
4. A jumper, and blouse for myself
5. Learn to dye and spin
6. Design patterns

Education-wise and future and other stuff:

1. Do my homework for once
2. Actually sew my clothing designs
3. Start on webcomic
4. Develop better cleaning habits/skills.

Till next time.

As promised

My dad was being a total jerk a few minutes before this and I totally hit him. Ballsy, I tell you. I think I'm insane, but then again what he did seriously warranted it. Don't do this at home, kiddies.

Okay, more pictures. Lovely, eh?



WIPS and first finished project of the year. Grey mittens are Bella's Mittens made for a friend, but unfinished since I ran out of yarn for the thumb. LAME. Purple hat is Big Blue Beret, only purple. I learned how pompom handicapped I actually am. Sad. Last, red sock is Baudelaire. It's really pretty, but I've kind of gotten bored of it.



Stash! It's small, but I love it. It's mostly from last year with a sheeeetload of cheap acrylic, but it's useful in the event of emergencies. Plus, I can still go out and buy more when I get a project.



Now, here's the good stuff. Two hanks of Manos del Uraguay wool, Malabrigo Hand painted Thick & Thin, and that last one I keep forgetting but it's so lovely and green. If anybody is reading this, give me some pattern suggestions so I can knit them up and buy more.

Anywho, I've really got to get studying for my Chem test tommorow. IT'S ALREADY 7:30!! I'll be back since I need to scheme for my new goal of World Domination With Knitting aka, Knit Fame.

NOT AWESOME!!

I'm irked. What. The. Heck.



So, I started the hat a friend of mine requested. Look. Innocent looking, eh? Crappy magic loop attempt, huh? Look again.



WHAT IS THAT? A HUGE BONKING HOLE? This and the fact that my stitches are too loose because of knitting with a longer circular has pissed me off. PISSED, I TELL YOU!



I frogged it. You happy now, stupid UFO knit?



My work space. Hehe. I think I'll go buy DPNS. They're more friendly. ILU DPNS!

I know, I'm horrible

I'm such a terrible liar. Well, not really. I'm actually quite a fantabulous liar. I lie with such ridiculous ease, it's almost like breathing. I'm such a bad daughter/sibling/niece/student.

Anyways, I said I would have my stash and UFOs posted last week, but life is really, really cruel. Life and various other things come up. So. Not. Awesome.

Wednesday, my grandfather took a turn for the worse. Infact, my family fears he might croak this week. I, more of an optimist, am looking out for the brief sign he might actually pull through. Before his arthritis kicked, my grandpa was pretty darn healthy.

Also, I had a last minute procrastinated project. It was an independent study unit thing worth 30%. I'm pretty sure it was mediocre and I only managed a 70%. Har har.

Moving on to the topic of my knitting, I managed to finish a the hat I started last Saturday while trying to avoid my project. Oh yeah. I also watched Wool 100%. It was random. I admit it was cute, uplifting, and thought-provoking, BUT IT WAS JUST REALLY HARD TO TAKE IN. Not in the "You're so stupid" kind of way, but the WTF? kind. Still good.

I'm looking for my scissors again. I just found the damn things, and now my room has swallowed it up. I was looking for it while cleaning, and I'm kinda mad. If only I had a skein of Manos de Uraguay everytime I lost them. I also had a near scare of loosing my size 4 dpns.

Can anyone explain to me this whole cashmere coveting? I'm wonder what's so magic about. Is it that soft?

I'll be back with a pattern of the cowl, but if you're an intermediate beginner, you've already figured it out.

picture tiem, yes?

Hell yeahs. I have my laptop back for the time being, so pictures are a go. Although, my ever useless brother seems to have loaded a virus or something of the like that I can't seem to get rid of. Crap.

Instead of finishing the book I need to read for my super demanding English class, enjoy pictures with narration.



I was really sad to give this cowl to my aunt as a gift. It was so pretty and squishy and warm and soft. I blocked it, but lost all it's hold.




Made a pink version for my other aunt. Also modeled by me is the fleece bunny hat I made for my absolute soulBFF. She totally deserved it.




Lastly, a Slouchy Copy Cat Hat for my mama. With less slouch! Though, it turned out she wanted more slouch. Irony. Ignore how tired I am in this. I pretty sure it was 4am when I finished it.

I have more craptastic things to show you, but it's too dark to give pictures without resorting to flash. Will post tomorrow so you don't have to cringe at the gross glare. It's sad the only real good place for taking pictures in my house(more correctly, parents') is the bathroom.

Btw, if you haven't watch Dr. Horrible yet, GO WATCH IT NOW. It's soo awesome.